I was very pleased to find that the giant Tesco has started carrying Grape Nuts cereal again. I love grape nuts. It fits my morning perfectly. I find breakfast a minefield of problems. I used to always eat a large breakfast, I was the breakfast girl. But when I started going to the gym and jogging in the morning, breakfast became a problem. A big problem. What I ate determined the quality of my workouts. If I ate too much protein I'd burn through the calories too fast and be starving mid-workout, too much cereal and I'd be over full and bloated and feel like I would heave at every corner. I have to eat breakfast, as hunger pains in my workouts are very painful and distracting. Grape Nuts is the only breakfast that makes the perfect balance. I can eat the recommended 30g with soy milk and small handful of raisins and the hunger is gone, the energy is there and I'm not so stuffed I end up with a stitch in my side or feeling like I'll puke. I also don't burp the whole time I'm running which is nice too and an unfortunate side effect of corn flakes and/or omlettes. The best part is, it keeps me from thinking about eating until about 11-12 which is when lunch is - and isn't that the whole point?
Having started following the Paul McKenna diet plan (That is an awkward sentence - yuck - do over) I started Paul McKenna's diet plan in January, and struggled here and there because I have food anxiety and also treat anxiety with food. I did follow the full book with all the visualizations and trying to love the parts of myself I actually dislike the most, and sure it was ok but always felt, you know, silly. But what I completely appreciate and have clung to are his four rules (Eat when you're hungry, Eat what you want and not what you think you should have, Eat slowly and conciously and enjoy every bite, When you are full stop eating.) and those are where I focus my attention and practice daily. It's not been easy, it's hard to change a lifetime of faulty wiring and having to constantly question what I'm eating and why I'm eating which was, in the beginning, a fucking chore! But I get it now, it's habit and it works. It's working. The weight is coming off, slowly and properly. My exercise and stamina are up (When I'm not playing swap the cold with the family) and the two pairs of fat jeans which were the only two ones I had to fit, are getting big, and the tighter ones are starting to fit. Motivation comes from success. So if I let myself succeed, even a little, I get those rewards. Sure the worry of, what if I get down to my goal weight, I look great, I feel great and then for some reason I forget everything and go back to old habits and gain it all back? Well, I ask myself that a hundred times a day. I have to keep saying, we'll not know until we get there, so stop worrying about it. Just get through today, one workout, one mile, one meal at a time. In the end, the only one who can support me in this, is me.
So I'm really happy the store has Grape Nuts, again. So happy in fact that I bought two boxes.