Thursday, December 11, 2008

Where I come across a bit bitchy...

Because I just am today. All right? If not, then tough shit. I just am.

First off I want to tell Oprah to fuck off. Seriously, how many years have we had to endure this egomaniac and her weight issues? Fucking narcissist. So she's over 200lbs again - so fucking what? Now we'll have to suffer through her new enlightenment about her weight gain/loss issues. I know how she gained weight; she stopped working out as much and gave up the strict diet her trainer had put her on. Duh. Not a mystery. It's what happens to millions all over the world. Don't moan about it, don't carry on with the woe is me and begging for attention. If it bugs you then go back to the restrictive lifestyle that previously did the trick. Or you could get some sense and try not giving a shit anymore. It's not like you're keeping slim for Stedman any more. Didn't Stedman end up being gay? I'm sure I read that, which made me a bit annoyed but then I remembered I didn't give a shit about Oprah and her parasitic friends. So here's the thing; Oprah and her fat butt can fuck off. It's all a publicity stunt and quite honestly, no one should care.

I have a cold. Again. Damn fucking head colds! AND I just got the samples of perfume from Michael Storer and I can't even smell them. Well that's a lie because they are all EDP and I can smell them even through the stuffed nose but I can't smell them properly which annoys the tits off me. Also I got my period about 20 minutes ago. Which doesn't annoy me as it was expected but really - a cold and my period all at once is just cruel. Sense of smell is heightened during menstruation and ovulation so right now would be the best time to try out these scents to see if they make me ill or I love them to their every chemical component. But I can't smell them! AND it's not like I can make a no kissing or hugging the kids rule, because you know and I know it's those little snot wipers who keep bringing the germs into the house, as that would be neglectful and I'm not a neglectful parent.

Currently loving the radio stations on iTunes. I don't know why I never dallied with them before! You bastards never told me! The alternative stations are great and I even spent a wee bit of time listening to my old favourite, WBCN Boston, but then I realized I was listening to ACDC and thought WTF?! and tuned off and in to KRock-2 in NY and love it! Love it to bits. Where's WBRU though?! Not in alternative, not in college radio, so where is it?! Fucking travesty to not have WBRU. Even worse if it went tits up.

I have no appetite. Don't want to eat - so not like me. So I know this is a serious bug. To take my appetite away is some real nasty. I brought sandwiches to my labour suite. They confiscated them, the bitches, because if I needed an emergency cesarean it's better on an empty stomach. Did they take them out of the room though - No. I had to look at them between contractions, starving and ready to hop off the table and go feral on those sandwiches. (I make nice sandwiches!) Nine hours of labour will do that to a woman. I've had a few nibbles here and there but mostly I've had tea and cups of this Korean chili miso soup I got from Japan Centre. Brilliant stuff. Can't taste it but it stings a bit going down so at the very least chili is something I can experience. That's what fucking Oprah needs! She needs to have her sense of taste and smell removed and then give her high doses of caffeine. She'll not eat and have energy to exercise. A diet of antiseptic cough lozenges and espresso. Seriously, I should patent that.

I just want to sit here, crouched like Snoopy The Vulture, over my keyboard, Depeche Mode in my ears and not have the rest of the world interfere. But eventually, someone wants me. This time, Shorty wants me to help her get into her dragon costume. She had her Christmas concert this morning at school which was great fun to attend. I love seeing the wee kids all singing at different times, one shouts the loudest, one dances the craziest and they all look in different directions or wave at their own parent or pick their nose as if no one else is around. They were wonderful. Shorty was a Christmas tree. She's currently covered in glitter and dressed like a dragon.
Grrr!Grrr...wait what's on the telly.

Forgot to take the macro lens off the end of the camera first. Fuck it.

Can't stop peeing. If I didn't have my period I'd be wondering if I was pregnant.

I think I'm done now. I may be back later with more to complain about.

Husband has had bad/good news from work. I'll make him an apple pie. Damn this period or I could've given sex too but apple pie will have to suffice.

14 comments:

Dingo said...

Oprah and her fat/thin saga annoys the hell outta me too. STFU already, woman! If that's your biggest problem these days just STFU.

You know, if I were there, I'd sneak yummy food to you in between nurses visit. But if you had to have an emergency C-section, I would pretend that I had no idea how you got the Big Mac and Biggie Size fries. I'd probably blame it on Oprah.

Another radio tip: Pandora radio online. It's amazing.

Dingo said...

I mean, "If I'd been there..."

gusgreeper said...

i fucking hate Oprah.

Brook said...

Bitchy smitchy, obviously you need crisps and/or chocolate. And being hungry and not having the appetite to enjoy your food just sucks balls anyway! Just Sayin is all! And look at your Dragon Girl! Sooo cute.

tornwordo said...

It really is hard to sympathize with someone who has more money than god. I would've thought she'd have permanantly sucked all the fat cells out surgically by now. It does seem to be a decades long saga.

Northern musings said...

With you on the Oprah thing, for love of God woman - love your body love yourself and then you will be happy with whatever shape s/he gave you!!! We will all be subjected to the horrid childhood she had, yes Oprah, all children should have the right to a good childhood, you didn´t thats a BAD but time to GET OVER IT. My goodness, didn´t she give Dr Phil his own show cos he fixed up her f***ked up childhood issues and her eating issues... urrgghhh that woman really gets me going..

Northern musings said...

ps - i have my period too.. probably too much information - but may explain the ranting comment

Jomamma said...

I agree... I saw the preview and thought it was a re-run from years ago! I think the world is over her televising her weight issues. I hope her ratings for that show dropped like a stock market. She hasn't had anything worth watching since she had the people doing the Debt Diet... and she should have slapped the hell out of Tom Cruise for jumping on her couch like some sort of monkey. I don't care if you can buy couches right and left all day long, when some dorky shit jumps on your furniture you knock the hell out of him... she has no balls!
OMG... the ranting is contagious... and my period is due this weekend!

Jomamma said...

I agree... I saw the preview and thought it was a re-run from years ago! I think the world is over her televising her weight issues. I hope her ratings for that show dropped like a stock market. She hasn't had anything worth watching since she had the people doing the Debt Diet... and she should have slapped the hell out of Tom Cruise for jumping on her couch like some sort of monkey. I don't care if you can buy couches right and left all day long, when some dorky shit jumps on your furniture you knock the hell out of him... she has no balls!
OMG... the ranting is contagious... and my period is due this weekend!

Jomamma said...

Woo hoo... double post, we all win!

aughra said...

I haven't been here in foreve! Your design is SUPER!

And fuck Oprah. God.

Roxrocks said...

The headlines read "Oprah is Humiliated" so of course, I love to read about the suffering of Oprah, but alas, she was just lamenting about the size of her big fat ass again. Instantly, I felt as you did! Frigging Oprah!

I had the cold and the day I started to be able to breathe again, my period started. Finally, I'm over both but I'm so damn far behind now!

Anonymous said...

www.wmbr.org

I used to live nearby. I left ten years ago, but still get mail from the Garment District!

Maja said...

I have been fighting a cold really really well. Jason got mega sick, I just feel the teeny tiniest bit crappy, and I'm convinced it's the zinc I'm taking along with my echinacea, cod liver oil and garlic horseradish vitamins.

Seriously you should take it.

Oprah is so fake. I can't sit through her show at any time.