I've been happily going along with life with all its routine and predictability. No major upsets. No troubles apart from the weird recurring dreams about going back to work in the bank. Then yesterday I saw something that's been poking and stabbing me and making me feel awful. I feel silly because it should just be brushed off, but I can't yet.
I saw a crow attacking a baby song thrush and its parents were making a racket and dive bombing the crow and the baby bird was probably just fledging, and the crow took its chances. When I came along the baby bird was still alive so I chased away the crow thinking that maybe I'd got there in time. The baby was in shock and I just knew it wouldn't make it. What do I do? What could I do? I did nothing. It's nature. It's the wild. It's what happens everyday in the woods when I'm not there to see it. I've done the trying to rescue injured baby birds before and they just die; too fragile, and I didn't want to stretch out the upsetting experience anymore then I had to.
I've felt awful ever since. I couldn't walk that path this morning because I didn't want to see the pulled feathers. Trying to just let it go.