So unfair. I'm getting sick. It's just not fair. I've had a great run of health as of late, this is no time for me to be sick. Fucking hell! Everyone else has been sick and I survived all their damned germs and coughing. No fair I get sick now. I'm just not going to believe it. Nope. Ignore the swollen glands in my neck, ignore my oozing left ear and sore teeth. I've taken a pain killer and dammit the pain will be killed. Squashed. Fucking tonsils.
I've been in a steady denial since I woke up this morning, but I've just gotten a fever and now...fucking bastard germs. I want to go to the gym today! I have things o do there - all this work on my arms will be postponed and that bugs me! No way. I'm going. Sore head or not. No tonsil with an agenda of its own is keeping me away from what I want - and I want to go to the gym. Fuck sitting on my butt feeling sick all day.
Vitamin C, lemon tea, lots of water to ensure I pee. I will not be sick.
I need a beach I can swim at. I need to go on vacation with Sarah. Speaking of whom, I had a dream about last night. But it wasn't a nice dream which I found disappointing because Sarah is all things nice. But in my dream she'd invited me over for a weekend, and I was really excited and then she was kind of short tempered and harassed because she was planning a party and was behind schedule for getting ready, so I helped her get ready, and then we were all at the party. where I only had one drink because I don't like to get drunk at parties, especially if I don't know everyone and then I was sick on her carpet! I was so embarrassed! She was obviously fuming, and I cleaned it up as best I could. the next morning Sarah was up early in a panic because her landlord was coming over to inspect the property pre-lease renewal. (I have no clue if they rent or own or whatever - this is a dream!) I ran around clearing empties, and wiping surfaces, pulling the vacuum around etc. When the landlady showed up, she homed in on the sick stain on the carpet - I told her I was going to the dry cleaners for a carpet shampooer this afternoon so not to worry. She looked at me like "yeah right" and walked off. What should've been a wonderful visit with a wonderful person, tuned into an exercise of "How small can we make Lyvvie feel?". Didn't like it. Then I do remember saying to Sarah in my defense wafter I was sick "I've not thrown-up since 1994! I don't know why now!"
Now I know. Damned subconscious trying to inform me: You're sick. Just so you know.
I need hand weights at home. I could do my arm, chest, shoulder, upperback routine from here and skip the cardio. But I don't have any. Maybe I'll do that anyways, just go to the gym for the weights and leave the run and X-trainer out. Logic states I should do things the other way around. My body won't feel as strong and won't respond to weights as well as normal and the cardio would help keep my body temperature up and kill more germs - I have no clue if that is true or not but it makes sense to me.
Crap. It's raining out now. It's looking like the world is stacking the deck against me. Fuck You! I'm going to the gym and you can't stop me.
I will not be tired!