Friday, April 07, 2006

I'll just have live in Denial

Look! We're in the Wild Bird Watch Zone!!

Kind of takes the fun out of Eider Ducks we get in our local cove. It's still all a bit "Well it could be this...Could be that." going on. Perhaps the swan they found on the beach came in on the tide? Could have died while flying over. Of course, he may have died en route, but his buddies might have landed on our soil. The countries are acting like "Ew, you've got cooties now!", not really, but it feels like that. We've got cooties.

Today they're looking at a bunch of dead seagulls. The news keeps telling us not to panic, don't make a drama into a crisis (that's just stupid, really. Politicians should read from teleprompters, and not speak their minds.) But, honestly, I'm not too bothered. Perhaps I'm susceptible to the "don't panic" messages being implanted into my head every 15 minutes. I'm already immune to it, I already shouting "Shut the fuck up about the dead bird!" I mean, I lived through the O.J. Simpson escapades, I watched the white bronco runaway, live. I kind of figure, that's enough for my large scale news interuptus. I'm not even going to start with 9/11.

Is that selfish; that I'm bored to death with news abuse? That the constant death and doom crimps my style and really, I'd rather listen to the Tweenies than another up to the minute update of nothing new at all? Why haven't dumb folks with "balls of steel" lawyer sued the news networks yet for making them depressed with all their gloomy-doomy reports? If they can sue McDonalds for making them fat, surely CNN can be sued for unworthy mood depressant. "I watched it for hours every day and it was always so awful; blood, bombs, death and then my home team lose! I was close to slitting my wrists." and of course we'd all shout "Why didn't you, you dick?" but still, they'd get plenty of air time on CNN.

Since I'm in denial, I'm not going to bother with all that birdie-piffle. I went to the gym today, pushed a little harder than normal. I've noticed my usual workout doesn't get my heart rate up as much as it used to, so I'm going to assume the machines are faulty, or I'm actually get fitter. Wouldn't that be a bitch?! I mean, I already feel like I'm pushing my limits, and now my body's trying to tell me "Push it MORE, bitch!!" I've got my own personal trainer lub-dubbing away in my chest. I mentioned to the hubs that I may actually be willing to pay (meaning he'll pay) for an annual membership, rather than paying per visit. Well, I did pay per visit in the beginning, then about a month ago I committed to buying ten sessions at once. So, the next big step is to go annual. It's a big step, but I'm quite happy about where this fitness malarky is going.

The past couple of days I've been really hungry. I seem to be having hunger pains all the time. I'm eating what I normally do, but at the moment, it's not been enough. I was using the pec-dec this morning when my stomach let out a ten second long growl that made the guy across from me look at me funny. I was worried he'd thought I'd farted, so I grabbed my tummy, made a face, and said something like "I swear I ate breakfast before coming in today." Then he laughed.

This also reminds me of an e-mail I got recently about a toilet that is my worst nightmare. I often have horrible dreams of desperately needing the toilet but can only find a toilet right in the middle of a busy shopping mall, and can't pee because everyone is looking at me and laughing at me. So this toilet - not cool.


tornwordo said...

Denial is good, because the threat to you and your family is infinitessimally small. More Tweenies sounds perfect.

Hysterical toilet.

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

Go ahead. Buy the membership. You've already proven you'll stick with it.

Maja said...

I hardly ever watch news, but I did last night and I saw your town and I remembered how you'd talked about that swan some time ago and wondered if that was where you were.


Man, dontcha just hate it when you get fitter, because that only means you have to work harder to lose more weight, doesn't it? Hey but if you're so fit now you must have more muscle which automatically needs more energy just to exist which is why you're so hungry!


Lyvvie said...

Tornwordo - See, I know this, right inside, I do. But the media man, The Media!

I've decided Tweenies are also torture and have changed to Scooby-do reruns.

LBB - I've "planted the seed" (wink to Maja) about the annual sunscription. Hubs will need about a month to mull it over.

Maja - I hope that's all it is, I was going to sneak about your blog to find Neel's link and ask him. I woke up at 4:20 this morning hungry again, I tried to sleep it off but after an hour I had a glass of milk and a banana. I've not had this problem since I was pregnant.

We're about 40 miles away from the bird was found. but the whole Forth Estuary right up to the Forth Road Bridge is in the zone because of the many bird sancuaries on the small inlands in the estuary. I'll e-mail my post code and you can Google Earth me.